Tuesday, December 6, 2011

The art of seduction

Sex is still extremely infrequent in our household. And while I did determine that I can have an orgasm without pissing myself (Yay.), I still don't have much interest, and there's also the fact that after Bun Bun's in bed (around 7), we just want to kick back, and then before you know it, I have no love left for anything but my pillow. Fortunately, I have stumbled upon the key to reigniting the FLAME.



This excerpt comes from a poster on relationships that recently appeared in the bathroom down the hall from my office, in the section entitled "consent can be sexy". And although college students are the intended audience, I think we can all learn something, don't you? I'm going to try it out as soon as possible.

Hey, Mr. Bunny. What do you think about doing sexy action?

Well, Bunny, I really like sexy action. Can we do that?

12 comments:

  1. Close your eyes, give me your hand, darlin'....

    "Sexy action" is a bit too vague, though, since I could easily complete your conversation this way:

    'Hey, KB. What do you think about doing the laundry?' 'Well, Jen, I really like doing the laundry. Can I do that?'

    Getting moist just thinking about it.

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  2. Very funny, I thought you were going to say the poster was from the 1950s or an excerpt from a foreign language guide "what to say in a massage parlor in Bangcock".

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  3. AHA! Yes, that is utterly natural dialogue of the type you could hear all across the English speaking world. I will implement it at once!

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  4. True story: I had a job writing video scripts of couples "negotiating safer sex" using choices from a menu of activities -- and by Menu, I mean it was divided into appetizers, entrees and desserts. (your tax dollars at work, by the way.) If you and mr. Bunny need any help with this project, my rates are very reasonable.

    Ps, my word verification is "mates."

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  5. Ha. Somehow, that takes all the fun out of it. And, "sexy action"? Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

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  6. It's a sex-related sentence completion task! Although, I think the blanks should only be filled with . It leaves more to the imagination, therefore more tantalizing, in my opinion.
    (and my captcha is spill)

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  7. So simple. If only I had known this earlier.

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  8. Bionic, you're cracking me up. Now I'm imagining what dessert could be.... ? Reminds me of a more humorous take on the Antioch rules.

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  9. You always make me smile. Yay! for not pissing yourself during an orgasm! That's huuuuuge!

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  10. Yay for restored pelvic muscle tone!

    And, yeah, I'm going to be thinking "sexy action" for a long time to come.

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  11. HAhahhaa.

    So glad you're on the up and up when it comes to sexy action. :)

    xoxo

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  12. Sexy Action? who wrote that!?
    It's been some time since you posted this so you've left me wondering if you've been busy doing the sexy action with Mr Bunny this whole time?
    x

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