A few cycles ago I bought some of the fancy digital pregnancy tests, the kind that provide the result in words. I was tired of looking for phantom second lines and figured a blunt "not pregnant" would be easier to take. Plus, variety. After two boxes worth of "not pregnant" I've determined that it's
not easier to take, and there's some extra guilt associated with putting all that garbage into the landfill. The digital tests are about fifty times larger and more plasticy, and contain a battery and everything. BUT, it also occurred to me that there's a real opportunity here for specialized supportive pregnancy tests for infertile couples. After all, if a pregnancy test is going to give you a message, why can't it be a nice message? For example...
Needless to say, these tests would have to be specially marketed, as not every woman wants a pep talk. And there's also an opportunity here for women who are terrified of a positive test. E.g., not pregnant. hallelujah! or perhaps pregnant. it's going to be okay. Anyway: MONEY MAKING OPPORTUNITY. Perhaps if I don't get tenure because I'm so unproductive as a result of infertility, I'll move forward with my excellent invention.
All things pregnancy (or not)-related and baby-related are instant money-makers. Take any household item, say, a Kleenex or a fork, and put "baby" on the package and voila! cha-ching. I mean, really, baby wipes are just big moist towelettes. With a picture of a baby on the packaging. I think this could work with pregnancy-related swag as well. You're on to something with this untapped pregnancy testing marketing opportunity...how about a test that sings a little song as it displays the result? You could market tests with different outcomes to the right demographics -- don't want to be pregnant? A "Not Pregnant" result will give you a Freddy Mercury serenade of "We Are the Champions." Want to get pregnant but can't? A "Not Pregnant" result might be accompanied by "You Can't Always Get What You Want." Testing early in your nth IUI or IVF cycle? Your "Not Pregnant" result will play "No Surprises." There's work to be done here...
ReplyDeleteTotally hilarious! I hadn't even realized the potential for things like "Baby Doritos" and "Baby Lint Brush". Awesome.
ReplyDeleteLOL I would love to have a pregnancy test give me some sort of support. Cute entry.
ReplyDeleteIt's like a pregnancy test + a fortune cookie, all in one! Thanks for the chuckle. ;)
ReplyDeleteAnd welcome to the blogosphere! (Here from LFCA)