Saturday, March 20, 2010

Fuck you, census.

Question 1. How many people were living or staying in this house, apartment, or mobile home on April 1, 2010. Number of people = 02.

Started crying.

Question 2. Were there any additional people staying here April 1, 2010 that you did not include in Question 1?

Box 1: Children, such as newborn babies or foster children.

Full on tempest o' tears.

I mean, I understand the purpose of the census and all, but couldn't you have started with income or education or something that might have made me feel GOOD about myself?


  1. I made my husband fill it out.

    I'd better have more than 2 people on the 2020 census or heads will roll.

  2. I just did my taxes today and had the same reaction.

    TurboTax: Did you have a baby in 2009? (some cute picture accompanies this question)

    Me: sniff, sniff. I mean, if I can have full on faucet-style tears in response to a story about an infertile chicken... c'mon.

  3. I just filled out ours today. I was tempted to write my name in as "M. T. Uterus" but held myself back just in time. I hate the census. It's like a high school reunion (which I am going to boycott), maybe I'll have better news by the next one?

  4. Ugh...thanks for the warning! I haven't gotten ours yet. Is there a place to leave comments, like "no, I'm fucking infertile you asshole!" That would be nice. =)

  5. ... is it just me or did the second question pretty much just repeat the first question? Um, excuse me Census questionnaire, how many times do you want me to say it... I AM CHILDLESS. If I had a child then I would have answered 03 in the first question. You don't need to re-word the question and ask it again, I think I would notice if I had a newborn baby in the house, believe me, I wouldn't have forgotten about them!!

    I mean seriously, if you had children wouldnt it have been included in Q1? Or am I stupid (as well as childless)?


  6. And then, no doubt it asks what age bracket you are in - just to rub it in ....

  7. I just filled our census shit out today, first one I've ever filled out. I thought it would have interesting questions about level of education or religious affiliation, etc on it, but it didn't. Just name, age, household number. YAWN.

  8. Aw, dammit. I haven't started the paperwork yet. I was already gearing up to explain my stay-at-home status, I forgot about the whole KID thing. UGH.
    Stupid nosy government.

  9. Oy. I haven't filled out ours yet..thx for the heads up. I'm hoping to at least double our number by 2020.

  10. Why didn't you take the Teabaggers' assvice and NOT fill out the census? Don't you know it's just how the federal gestapo keep tabs on you? If they asked about your education, then they would fine out you are an intellectual and silence you! Gah! (Sorry, guess I'm just still amazed that health care reform passed and it didn't trigger Armageddon. Whew.)

  11. I'm cool with a chimpanzee at this point...

    Or even a baby quail would do.