I am stupid and work sucks.

I am stupid. I know absolutely everything about reproduction, except this very fundamental thing: the whole alternating between two ovaries thing is an oversimplification. Thanks, Finch and Trinity, for smartening me up! In fact, my research suggests women younger than thirty do tend to alternate sides, but ancient creatures like myself are more likely to ovulate from the same ovary month to month. Also, the right ovary appears to be slightly more active over one's reproductive life, with about 55% of ovulations happening from that side. So...let's hope my body doesn't decide that it's time to give the right side a break.

(Oh, and while we're on the subject of being misled, In case some random woman with fibroids reads my last post, I wanted to add a tiny clarification. READ THIS TOO, RANDOM WOMAN! It's not the case that the overall rate of miscarriage in women with fibroids is 60%--that's just the percentage of women in one study who had a miscarriage prior to myomectomy, and women with recurrent pregnancy loss due to fibroids often have the surgery. So 60% is quite exaggerated.)

I am also stupid because when my RE told me to "call to schedule a Lupron shot" I had no idea what I was getting into. First, I would need to get a prescription, 'cause that's how drugs work. That took a couple of phone calls. Then, I would need to get the prescription filled. It took a couple of phone calls just to discover that I had the choice of paying $700 or requesting "authorization" from my insurance company to get the meds via mail order. At this point I handed things over to Mr. Bunny, who works in the insurance biz. I watched with dumbfounded gratitude as he negotiated several more phone calls which he indicates will result in our insurance company rejecting the claim but me still getting the drugs via mail order without too much delay. I am READY FOR MY MENOPAUSE (and deep bone pain--thanks JB and hope4joy for that enticing prospect), peoples!

And work sucks. One of my duties is to meet with with job candidates to tell them how great Mediocre Institution is and convince them to come (in the event they actually get an offer). Last week I met with one who wanted to talk a whole lot about babies. Do you have kids? No, but we really *suppressed sobbing* want to. What's the parental leave policy? Blah blah blah... What sorts of resources are there on campus for parents? Here I got to talk about the faculty group for parents that I foolishly joined when I first started trying, thinking it would be good to get a head start. Wow, do I hate thinking about that. Tell me in great detail about schools in the area. You know, the ones you'll never have any children to send to.

I hate being faced with a hopeful young thing who is just beginning her journey. It makes me feel so old and depressing. I know just what she's thinking, 'cause I was thinking it too, three years ago. I'll get this job, I'll wait a semester or two, and then I'll get pregnant! I hope it works out that way for her. In fact, I hope it works out that way for her at some other institution. So I never have to see her with a stupid fat belly all full of baby.