Monday, August 2, 2010

Ich bin ein Berliner

Except not any longer, as I'm home. I'm pleased to see that all some of you needed to get knocked up was for me to leave town; if I'd known I'd have left long ago. The trip did not have the same effect on my own personal uterus. I got a big fat NOT PREGNANT this morning. Oh yeah, I remember this feeling of devastation and despair and total non-surprise! Good to have it back.

I'd like to tell you that I had a wonderful trip and didn't think about babies for an instant, but while I had a good trip on the whole, I thought about babies a hell of a lot. I admire those of you who can put the topic out of your minds, though in my defense, there were a few things working against me. To begin with, babies was the unofficial theme of my conference. All my colleagues were either pregnant, showing me baby pictures, or not attending because of their impending deliveries. IT SUCKED. It made me feel really left behind, particularly because all these horrible women ALSO seemed to be extremely intellectually productive. It's almost like I just spent two years accomplishing nothing and being miserable while everyone else was having a normal life!

It also turns out that everyone in Berlin is pregnant. (Even the men.) This is stupid, but it was actually depressing to face the fact that it's not just the entire American population that can have loads of children, but the rest of the world as well. Except for us.

So yeah. That was a rather gloomy travelogue. But that's my style.

Less gloomy tidbits include discovering that my German is totally adequate. You know, not for elaborate conversation, but for basic interactions, I'm THE SHIT! We also had some tasty food, saw some lovely sights, and, because Mr. Bunny has been saving his miles for a million years, flew first class. Duuuuuuuuude! I've never done it before, and...I like it.

Now that I'm home, I'm facing year three of IF. I can't let it be as bad as year two. I have no idea, let alone any concrete plan, for how to make it better. But at least I have this super awesome resolution. Sweet. While I'm mulling it over, please enjoy these faceless travel pictures.

The view from our hotel in Frankfurt.
Fr├╝hst├╝cksetagere! I'd tell you where I had it, but that neighborhood has the largest concentration of bellies ever seen.
The universal expression that goes with "This Flammkuchen is way too fucking large! Why is this happening to me?"


  1. Welcome back! I was actually in Berlin a couple weeks ago, visiting a friend, and I'm pretty sure we brunched at the place with the several-tiered yummies, although we didn't have any ourselves.

    Also, no kidding on the international pregnant ladies. I was taking a class at the Louvre the last two weeks, run by two French women who teach at an American university. First day I meet the in-charge lady, I see she's pregnant. Rad. She's totally lovely, but, dude, I was supposed to be pregnant now (and then). She later told me it took her six years to get pregnant, and so I decided to hate her less. Then, at the end of the class, it turns out the other prof is pregnant, too. Didn't think it would happen so soon! Well that's just great.

  2. Oh no, once you fly first class, you'll never want to go back to coach...ever. I flew business once to Dubai and it was POSH. Flying on to Munich coach was THE PITS after that!
    Holy cow, that fruit/salad/tiered whatever is absolutely amazing! Looks so delicious.
    Glad you're back, but sorry about the negative :(.
    I missed your posts while you were gone, btw.

  3. You are indeed a lovely jelly doughnut. Sorry the Germans turned out to be so fecund. They are all about the precision, though.

  4. Welcome home, bunny!! missed you and your posts while you were dodging baby bumps in Germany.

    Sorry about the negative :-(

  5. Welcome home. I am so sorry that IF issues have followed you out of the country. I find that they follow me around as well and it just sucks. I am wishing a better year three for you as well (fingers and toes are crossed).
    P.S. I recently traveled business class for the first time ever, it was fabulous!

  6. Welcome home! I can't decide which I love more: your captions or your scissors pendant. Sorry about all the productivity on display - oof!

  7. Welcome home!!! I had a dream about you last night, that you posted today with u/s pics and were KU. So maybe it will happen soon (I hope!) Anyways, you were missed. Glad you're back safe and sound.

  8. BUNNYYYYY!!!! welcome back!!!!! Missed you.
    I hope there were lots of pregnant woman sqaushed into coach that had to walk past you all stretched out in your first class spacious luxury. How bout that... a pregnant that was jealous of an infertile!!! Savour it baby!
    The food looks amazing, its making me hungry.... Sorry there were so many pregnant bodies around you, that really does make it harder to relax. Hugs to you. xxx

  9. Ugh, sorry pregnancy chased you everywhere during the conference. That is so hard. Your food pics look so yummy. glad you had a fun time.

  10. Bunny, that fruit plate makes me want to lunge into the screen and scarf it down!!! Oh my God, that looks yummy!!!

    Fucking competent pregnant ladies. Gotta hate them. How can they spew babies and publications like fucking machines? I don't get it. And too bad about the pregnant Berliners, too. Gah!

    I'm glad you're back-- and glad you had basically a good trip (and first class!! very very cool). I'm also very sorry about the -hpt, but I know that you will be moving along quickly in your plans if you don't get a + on your own soon, so I have every hope and trust that you will soon be a pregnant lady too-- how intellectually productive of one, I don't know :). It hasn't worked wonders for MY career impetus.

  11. Bunny, I missed you. I am so very glad you are back, and that you had a good time overall. Love the food pics, especially the one with wine!I got to fly biz class a few times as a perk of my previous was awesome.

    Oh I hear you on this...feeling left behind everyone else was out there being sucks. I think that's one of the worst aspects of IF, how it just ends up taking over your life.

    So sorry to hear about the negative. I will mix you a vodka cocktail of your choice.

    Thank you for your lovely comment. xo

  12. Those are some very artful shots. The one with the fruit looks like a modern-day Toulouse Lautrec - the expression on your face (well, on your mouth) makes me wonder if you had spotted one of those many pregnant Berliners behind the cameraman:)

    I'm sorry about the "Not Pregnant" and the unofficial baby theme of your conference. Ugh. It's depressing to know that it can follow you EVERYWHERE (though, I really shouldn't be surprised at this point). But kudos on your language skills!

  13. Welcome home Bunny.

    Everyone is cracking me up today. What a laugh.

    I am sorry about the negative.

  14. I'm glad you're back, Bunny! I missed you! Don't you wish you had a magic wand so you could take specific infertility memories out of your brain and let them swirl around in a big stone pot a-la-Harry-Potter while you go enjoy Germany? Glad you at least got some good food and first-class seats.

  15. welcome back bunny!!!! looks like you were travelling in style - glad to have you back though :o)

    i was hoping you'd come back and announce a bfp, so boohoo on the bfn. i hope aug/sept are better months for us :o( frankly, if i get knocked up in sept, i'll have a gemini baby (yes i calc'd already), which is what i want ANYWAYS. my 3 closest friends plus hubby are all gemini's, so i guess it's just *meant to be* that i get a gemini baby!!!! hear that universe!!!?? hello?

  16. Oh how I missed your awesome posts and thoughtful comments (like warm fuzzies, I tell you!). I'm sorry about the BFN and that there were preggos buzzkilling your awesome Germany adventure....blaaaaaaah. It does sound like you managed to have a good time all things considered and I am proud of you! Okay then, let's do this month, mmmkay body?

  17. Welcome back!!! The food looks yummy... but the pregnant bellies everywhere kinda makes it sound like Germany is hell.

  18. Welcome home, Bunny. We missed you! Damn Germany and all its pregnant people...but glad you managed to enjoy yourself, AND snag a first class seat. Is it weird that I kind of like traveling if it's first class?

  19. Please tell me this plague of fecundity stops at the borders of Germany and has not made its way into Denmark or Sweden yet. If I arrive there next week and am greeted by a sea of bumps I will not be pleased! I could have stayed in Park Slope if I wanted to see that!

    I hear you on first class. We were upgraded for our honeymoon flight to Greece and it was absolute heaven. Have been trying to finagle another upgrade ever since to no avail. Sadness.